Divorce is probably as painful as death
Many years ago, the myth began to circulate that if parents are unhappy, the kids are unhappy, too. So separation could be helpful for both parent and children.
“What’s good for parents is good for the children too,” it was assumed.
However, this is not true in every case. Parental separation can probably be a difficult time for family, it leaves children struggling emotionally which may lead them to isolation, loneliness & social difficulties, and sometimes maybe more dangerous than you realize!
There could be lots of common reasons that lead to broken marriages, which may include lack of understand, support & trust, ego clashes, marital expectations like abuse and marital rape etc.
Depending on the age of children, divorce may have different effects on their mind. If he is an adolescent, for example, divorce may be easier because he or she has already come into their form of independence, while a younger child still depends on his or her parents for more things.
With this in mind, here I have compiled a list of different elements that may disturb your children after parental separation.
Poor performance at work/school:
As a I mentioned earlier, the effects of divorce are varied upon children with different age groups. If he or she is school going, it sounds like a great distraction and interruption in their daily academic life, these dangerous effects can harm their performance. The more distracted children are, the more likely they are to not be able to focus on their school work.
The effects of parental separation equally disturbs a mature independent person, he or she also needs help to cope with this immensely difficult time. The feeling that your family is getting shattered is itself much hurting than any other thing in the world, because family is your first support system; and when you realize that your support system is being destroyed, you start feeling emotionally, mentally and physically so unstable and helpless! And at the end, you start developing withdrawal from everything & everyone.
Loss of interest in social activities:
According to recent researches, divorce affects children socially, as well. Children whose family is going through a divorce may have a harder time relating to others, and they tend to avoid making social contacts. Sometimes children feel insecure and wonder if this is their fault behind everything, they even try to put all their efforts to make things good, but still, when they see everything is falling apart in spite of all the efforts, they experience a great trauma which leads them to withdrawal from society and even from their close friends.
Parental separation or divorce can harm children emotionally and make them over-sensitive. It bring several uncertain emotions to the forefront, and sometimes society start disliking them due to their over sensitive and unacceptable behavior. They start developing feeling of loss, anger, confusion, anxiety, and many others.
Separation often leaves children feeling overwhelmed. They need an outlet for their emotions, like finding someone to talk to, someone who can listen and understand…
Anger and anxiety disorders;
In some cases, with anger, children start developing different anxiety disorders. They need help and counselling to accept things. They don’t know how to respond to the affects they feel during separation, they don’t know how should they face society, and this results in anger and anxiety.
Children processing divorce may display anger at their family, friends, colleagues and others in the circle. While for many children this anger dissipates after several weeks, if it persists, they should really find someone to help and understand this behavior.
Increase in health problems:
The process of divorce and its effects on children can be a stressful. Dealing with these issues can make them physically so weak. Children who experience divorce have a higher perceptibility to sickness, they face trouble in sleeping, take anti-depressants, and even suffer from heart problems.
Loss of faith in marriage:
Research suggests that children who experience divorce are more likely to have disturb relationship, and also lose faith in marriages. They feel no interest and happiness in relationships and try avoiding to the limit. Even if they love someone, they develop many insecurities which lead them to stay single for their whole life.
Divorce and parental separation can leave your children with a lot of pain and sadness. It leaves never-ending effects in their whole life and they don’t find a way to manage things in their own life.
Well, life doesn’t end if a marriage ends. It still goes on & on…there are no easy answers and solutions to deal with the situation- for both parents and children, the only need is to understand the things wisely, and cope with the situation bravely so you can save your family from being shattered!